"Jesus Wept"

I went over to my sister Tricia's house on Saturday night...while David and Jonathan were at Priesthood Session...and watched the movie "Charly" with my kids and nieces. It has been a LONG time since I have seen that movie...but nevertheless it brought me to tears once more. It is not necessarily the suffering that takes place when they find out that the main character is dying of cancer and leaving behind her husband and young child...but more the picture that Charly (the main character) paints of the Savior - when he comes to Lazarus's tomb. The Savior is comforting Mary and Martha...and he is weeping at the loss of his friend Lazarus. In the movie it explains that Charly's picture represents a loving Savior who did not diminish his friend's pain...but instead wept openly with them! He knew that moments later he would raise Lazarus from the dead...and that their tears were premature and would turn into true joy when their brother walked forward from his tomb...yet he wept with them. This hits me to the core of my heart...it represents to me the very essence of the Savior's heart and love for each of us! "Jesus Wept" what more beautiful words can you hear...they envelop so much more then just their obvious meaning! The Savior is not just a man who lived and died for our sins...but he is very much a part of our lives now! He watches over us...and feels every emotion that we feel...he understands each one of us to the depth of our hearts and soul! He laughs when we laugh, cries when we cry, and picks us up when we fall! He asks so very little of us...only that we turn our heart to him each day...let him be in control of our lives...and to trust that even when we don't understand why we must suffer through whatever comes our way...that we are NOT alone...and that he is with us every step of the way! I like watching Charly...because it wakens something deep within me...that gets pushed aside with the crazy, every day activities that threaten to make me forget. Get up, wake up the kids, get them breakfast, get them dressed, change diapers, pile them in the car and take them to school, come home and clean up the house, put your littlest one down for a nap, pick the kids up from school, help them with their homework, get them dinner, spend quality time with them, and go to bed...wake up and start the process all over again! How easy it is to forget that I am a daughter of God who loves me...who cherishes my thoughts, desires, my hopes and my dreams! How often I feel so alone...when I am always just a prayer away from my loving Heavenly Father and older brother! I don't want to forget the feelings that watching Charly envokes...I won't to hold onto them...to cherish them...to breathe deeply and let them overcome my soul! I'm so grateful for a Heavenly Father who loves me...even when I sometimes do not love myself! I'm grateful that even when I forget him...he NEVER forgets me! I'm grateful for an older brother who gave everything he had...and suffered so greatly that I could live again...and be made clean thru his blood! Jesus Wept...I don't know if there have ever been two more beautiful words...and I pray that one day I may be given the opportunity to kneel at his side...and bathe his feet with my tears! Tears of gratitude for all of the times he wept with me...for all of the times that he picked me up when I could no longer walk and gave me strength beyond my own. My heart is so full at this moment...and I pray that I may engrave the words: "Jesus Wept" upon the very center of it...so that those beautiful words and the overwhelming gratitude and love that I feel for my older brother will NEVER be forgotten! In the name of him whom I serve and dedicate my life too...even my savior, Jesus Christ, AMEN! ~ Christina Allen